Talk About Blyton!

Mystery (Five Find-Outer) Series – Mr Goon

March 27, 2011 – Paul says: Mr Goon! From a kid's point of view it was totally glossed over how much damage that kind of bad policeman could do - but he came close to ruining several lives over the course of the series. I first hated him for the way he treated the Pantomime Cat, but later grew to loathe him for his treatment of his nephew, Ern. The scene where he wakes Ern up in the middle of the night with a huge cane to beat him with is petty horrific to me - nightmarish abuse of the worst type. Enid Blyton was always way too sympathetic with the bigoted old bully, in my opinion.
June 8, 2011 – Robert Kent says: Ugh! He is very annoying and sometimes very stupid like what he did in the Mystery of the spiteful letters! He gave the clues to the find outers. It was hilarious in the sixth book when Fatty disguises as a woman to deliver a message to Ern. The way he treats his nephew Ern is really awful and he could if he is real become sued for that. Seriously.
June 26, 2011 – Yumaki Kayuno says: The way he treated Luke in Disappearing Cat was quite wrong too. As Luke says, he was 'all threats and shouts'! He didn't have complete evidence against Luke, so how could he be so mean to the poor boy? This really highlights the mean part of Mr. Goon!
Fatty says... Fatty says: We can always rely on old Goon to be mean and cruel!
July 9, 2011 – Macmohan says: Not only the Find Outers, Ern and wrong suspects of Goon hated him but also the residents of Peterswood. It is mentioned in many books that they don't like him. Wonder how he could continue his job like this.
April 3, 2014 – Saky says: When I read the mystery books as a kid, around ten years ago, I thoroughly enjoyed it when the Five Find-Outers (and Dog) went up against Mr. Goon. I despised him just as much Bets or any of the others did. But today, I can't help but feel sorry for him. Yes, he had a lot of faults. He was short tempered and not at all nice to feeble people who found it difficult to stand up for themselves. But, I don't think he deserved to be showed up by Fatty and the others so much. I don't think any of us would like it if someone pokes their nose into something, just for the heck of it. We must also remember that for Mr. Goon, it was his job and source of income. If it wasn't for Fatty, there would've been a couple of times he really shone. Who knows, he may have ended up with a promotion and thus, a better pay and pension?
Fatty says... Fatty says: Goon was a product of pre-war England, limited intelligence but having the power to arrest people made him pompous. He resented anyone who was more clever than himself. I agree, Saky, he had a pretty sad and unfulfilled life. Mind you, without the Find-Outers, Peterswood would have been the capital of crime!
February 17, 2015 – Evie M says: Personally, I feel a bit sorry for Goon as well! He is mean especially to Ern and the Find Outers. But I can understand his being annoyed when he can never solve mysteries, particularly in Missing Necklace when he is in the café trying to keep watch but the children are there instead. And whenever he rides his bicycle he always either falls off, gets a puncture, collides into the children or is harassed by Buster! Still he does provide humour.
February 17, 2015 – Cathy says: Wow I'm intrigued as to how you know all these in-depth details about these books when you say you haven't ever read them?!
February 17, 2015 – Evie M says: I got them a few days ago, Cathy, and I'm reading them all :) I'm on Hidden House now :)
May 25, 2015 – Nithya says: Well, I do feel sorry for Mr Goon, but it's not fair on his part to snoop and interfere in the Find-Outers matter. Even I would have done the same if I were The Find Outers!! It's no wonder why Fatty and the others fool him easily!! I read 'The Mystery Of The Hidden House' and was shocked to see the way poor Ern was yelled and punished by staying in his room. I thought in my head "That's just like Mr Goon! " Really, Mr Goon is apt for the tittle- 'Clear Orf'. Buster must have really enjoyed nipping his ankles!!
Buster says... Buster says: I certainly did!!!
March 9, 2016 – Evie Hamada says: Mr Goon is generally thought of as rude, cruel, nasty and strict. However, although he can be rude and sometimes unnecessarily mean to the children, most of the time I feel bad for him. You can't really blame him for his behaviour, I don't live in a village with a local policeman but I'm sure that if I did, and me and my friends kept trying to solve crimes, the policeman would tell us to stop interfering; it's natural for a policeman to be like that. And it seems that the children provoke him to get angry by playing pranks on him and saying things that they know will annoy him, then get upset and indignant when he responds in an angry way. What did they expect him to do!? All the Mr Goon hate is annoying, give the poor guy a chance!
March 31, 2016 – Paul Austin says: The more I think about it, the more I hope that the Find-Outers took pity on Goon some day and helped him have some comfort and security in his old age.
November 5, 2016 – vanessa says: I hope the Five are able to find out all mysteries before old Mr. Goon does.
Buster says... Buster says: The Find-Outers always solve the mystery before Mr Goon does.

PC Goon says: Less of the old, and show some respect for the law!
February 24, 2017 – Avan N.Cooverji says: Mr. Goon , the policeman in the Five Find Outers series is a very necessary part of the mysteries stories. If there was no Mr. Goon, the race to see who solves the mysteries would not exist and the main fun of the stories would be gone. Now coming to the main traits of Mr. Goon, it can be safely said that he is an unpleasant person and therefore disliked by the five children and dog Buster as well as most of the people of Peterswood. There are many unworthy traits in his character , for he is mean, unkind and pompous. He is not above offering a bribe and resorting to underhand means either, as when he offers a bribe to a young boy to catch Buster for him. Mr. Goon is also mean to his poor nephew Ern , will not pay him what he promised, so that shows him to be stingy and dishonest as well. Also he is unable to recognise a hand offered in friendship as Fatty does when he feels he has acted unfairly towards Goon. He is a person who can never forget or forgive. Now coming to the positive aspect in his nature, it also must be said that Goon is not lazy, and does try to improve himself, he goes for refreshment courses and makes an effort to try out various disguises and even goes out late at night in the cold to try to catch thieves and robbers. The Find Outers and dog do annoy him with their disguises and false clues but then only if he were a bit more pleasant , life would be easier for him for each time he is outwitted by the Find Outers, it adds a strike against him. Still without Goon in the picture , the stories would just not provide the punch and fun they do.
Buster says... Buster says: I agree that Mr Goon is a necessary part of the books, if he wasn't in them, whose ankles would I chase!
February 28, 2017 – Jamie says: Do we know how much money Mr Goon made?
Fatty says... Fatty says: A village PC was classed as 'servant class', so would have earned very little. He had a house provided - rent free - which made up for a low wage.
May 19, 2017 – Avan N. Cooverji says: Why Mr. Goon is the most disliked character in the Five Find Outers' series? This should be easy to answer. Mr. Goon is first of all pompous and mean and hardly has any redeeming qualities which should especially be present in an officer of the law, like maturity and good sense. Furthermore he is also dishonest and not averse to stooping to bribery if that gets him what he wants. He also backtracks on his promises, is easily influenced by flattery and is seen to be unkind to the poor and defenceless, the very people it is his duty to protect and assist. , in fact he is quite a bully with the helpless. He will not accept a hand offered in friendship nor will he let bygones be bygones but will thirst for revenge. All this combined with lack of sharp brains, it is easy to see why he remains a plodding policeman. , neither liked or respected. However, one does feel somewhat sorry for him also as he lives alone, does not seem to have any close ties or friends and that must be eating into his soul but only if he would be a little more pleasant in his dealings with the people of his village, it would make life easier for himself as well as for others.
May 22, 2017 – Paul says: Imagine Mr Goon facing off against more recent fictional detectives. Take the 1970s tv detective Columbo. I doubt Mr Goon would tolerate Columbo saying "just one more thing" and squinting with his fake eye!
July 6, 2017 – Avan N. Cooverji says: Why are you such a goon, Mr. Goon? Not to meet you will be too soon. The things you do , the words you say, surely makes an unhappy day. There was a time when people felt , you always hit below the belt, That is not good you see, for policemen naught such to be. So change yourself while there's still time, or soon enough one day fine, You'll find yourself in dire straits and have more than enough on your plates, More than you can bear it all, and that will be your final fall.
July 23, 2017 – Avan N. Cooverji says: One night I had a vivid dream, In which my cat ate all the cream, And when I woke up I really saw, Mr. Goon at my front door. I wondered why he had come , Had I done something wrong? Would he arrest me before long? And would that be my last swan song! Just then my cat beside me came, She did not look very tame, She licked my hand and gave a cry , And dared for Goon to even try, To do me any kind of harm, She held on tight to my arm, And bared her claws for him to see, If any hurt he would cause me. Goon took one swift glance at her, And saw her anger risen fur, He gave one squeak and ran away, For well he knew where his safety lay, Now no longer does he trouble me , For he knows what he will see, The cat beside me scares him off, Now all in town my cat they doff. So the easiest way to avoid Goon, Is to have a cat to make him swoon , There will be peace ever around , And all will be safe and sound.
PC Goon says... PC Goon says: Gah!
July 23, 2017 – Avan N. Cooverji says: AH! said Mr. Goon what saas! To set on me a mangy cat, I'll give my answer to that, I'll hit it with my cricket bat! You just do that and then you'll see, No one will be more cruel than me, I'll throw you in the village well, And loudly ring the old church bell. I am the law, you can't do that, No matter if I'm gross and fat, I will get at your mad cat, For she upon me did rat. Oh no you won't Mr. Goon, All this will end quite soon, For Peterswood t'would be a boon, To send you off to the moon. This war of words just went on, At the river and in the pond, In his own way both were fond, For theirs was a mutual bond. It was long and it was strong, and neither would trade it for a song, And though they went at it hammer and tong, It was just a game of ping-pong.
July 26, 2017 – Avan N. Cooverji says: An old man trudged down the winding lane, His back was bent-his knees gave pain , He leaned on his rickety cane, and sat on a bench in blinding rain. He closed his eyes and thought of the past, Of days he thought would always last, When all were at his beck and call, And he walked at least ten feet tall. Alas all that was over now, For none to him would ever bow , A tear escaped his bleary eye, Though he tried hard not to cry. He had no mate to comfort him, Now that his eyes were weak and dim, Just then near him stopped a van, And out ran a plucky young man. Why are you here Uncle Goon? You ought to go home soon, The weathers turned and it is cold, That's not good for one so old. I've made for you some kidney stew, And of tea a cup or two, Lets make a meal so we can eat, It'll surely be a lovely treat. Then he led him to his narrow bed, And covered him with a big blanket, He wished him well and saw him tucked, Snug as a bug in a warm rug. You're too good to me my boy, You're my only pride and joy, I was cruel and I was mean, I truly wish I'd not so been. Uncle Theo, that's all dusted and done, Just think of the times when we had fun, You once gave me a hot cross bun, Now think of me as your own son. The old man gratefully smiled, and on his nephew blessings he piled, Then he lay down his weary head, and went to sleep in his own warm bed. Next morning when Ern went to see, how his uncle would today be, He saw that he was stiff and cold, Nothing more now need be told. He called his friends to his Uncle's place, And all looked down at the poor dead face, They gently closed his vacant eyes, And silently said their own goodbyes. Frederick the leader of them all, Gave the final curtain call, All had ended-there was no case, For Mr. Goon had run his final race.

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